Pain is inevitable, but suffering is not.
I’ve come to realize something recently, in order to move on with everything in life, you must first accept how everything is right NOW. No, this does not mean to accept and settle, but rather to take control of your thoughts and use your acceptance as motivation. It’s easy to plan the future, but it’s even easier for things to not go as planned. So even if things aren’t going as expected, this isn’t the final outcome. In order to progress, change must occur…sometimes at first these changes won’t feel like progress but with the right mindset, it will all workout for the better.
- Your career/Lack of
If you feel stuck in a work environment that makes you sick to your stomach and depressed on a daily basis, it may be time to call it quits. But what about the bills? You may have to temporarily accept this work place in search for a new job or while you grow your own business. I’ll use my sister as an example, her situation is similar to my college career. She is an 8th grade math teacher who has grown to despise the career, but she owns a house, a car, pets, and has other bills to pay. So she has to stick to at least another year of teaching to make it through while she gets her MBA and builds her blog and other businesses. That is the light at the end of the tunnel! No one is stuck, at least not forever…accept where you are now, learn from it, take what you can from it, display hard work, but also do your best to find what will truly make you happy and excited to get out of bed in the morning.
- Your relationship(s)
Maybe your partner just left you, or cheated on you, or things are not going like they used to. Maybe you’re experiencing disappointment/ betrayal in friendships. Whatever it may be, accept it. Dig deeper into why you’re experiencing these problems, maybe you are the cause of some of these problems. You also have to realize that you can’t change someone, you can’t be held responsible for their decisions or actions. Let go if you need to.
- Your body/appearance
You’re too fat, too skinny, your nose is too big, your teeth are crooked, etc., etc. Are you going to let these things stop you from going on vacation? Laughing and smiling with friends? You shouldn’t!! Accept it, allow it to motivate you to get to the gym or save up for braces, enjoy your life through the journey, and if it’s something you can’t fix embrace it.
If you’re living paycheck to paycheck or you desire to be financially free, accept that you are not where you want to be right now. Dwelling on it or constantly thinking about your debt will get you no where. Come up with a plan and work hard to be where you want to be.
- Your past
Your past can hold you back from a lot of things in life. Whether you did things you regret, something tragic happened to you, or you had a rough childhood there is nothing that can be done about it now. It happened, it’s over. Learn from your mistakes, turn tragedy into triumph, or learn from others mistakes. You are responsible for how you react to everything in your life, let past challenges push you in the right direction. Avoid dwelling on situations and saying things like I should have…If only this didn’t happen…You could have…etc. These thoughts and sayings are training your mind to live in a world that can’t be altered, move on.
You may be thinking what? Spiritually? I’ll give my example…I am not religious, however I do practice meditation (which involves stilling the mind/mind control). I am TERRIBLE at meditating. Every week I go to a meditation center where we meditate for 40 minutes, I try and try, but without even noticing I start to think about blog ideas, school work I have to do, personal problems, you name it, it doesn’t stop. The “master meditators” say when you reach true meditation/stillness it will feel different, you may feel senses of floating or flying, your life and mental state begin to change in all aspects. I want that so bad, but it takes time and practice. Many people give up when things are difficult or challenging, but the outcome can be so much better the more effort you put in. One day I’ll reach that “still” state, but for now all I can do is accept that I struggle with it and keep trying!
So as you can see, this idea of acceptance can apply to all areas of your life. It may not be the easiest thing to do, but it’s possible. Remember, you don’t have to accept a situation or feeling forever, you are responsible for where your life and mind are going. Face the challenges, accept them, learn from them, grow from them, get motivated, and move on!