You can have confidence in your appearance, in who you are as a person, and the things you do.
Confidence is a feeling of capability, trust in yourself, and self-worth.
But confidence is also feeling good about your appearance and how you carry yourself.
To start, confidence comes with age and experience.
Insecurities I had as a teenager just don’t phase me anymore.
I’ve grown to appreciate my features and my personality, and I’ve gained experience in areas I wasn’t confident in before.
We all also overcome struggles in our life that come in different shapes and sizes. With breakups, job losses, going through college, traveling, loss of a loved one, etc. comes experience and the ability to get through hard things.
However, if you’re still struggling to build true confidence in yourself, then below are multiple things you can work on:
Gratitude
Gratitude is always one of the best places to come from.
If you don’t feel confident in your appearance, you can practice gratitude for the ability to see, hear, taste, smell.
If you don’t like your legs you can have gratitude for the ability to walk and move your body.
You can find gratitude for many things.
If you’re not feeling confident in yourself and your abilities, be grateful that you have a mind that can learn new things.
That you have the ability to change things with effort.
Challenge yourself
Challenge yourself by stepping outside of your comfort zone. The more you step outside of your comfort zone the more confidence you will gain.
As a human, your brain wants you to remain comfortable. When you do something uncomfortable, your brain tries to “keep you safe” by triggering fear.
However, you can train your brain to get more accustomed to this feeling and it will begin to feel safe with things that were once uncomfortable.
Self-discipline
Self-discipline is one of the best ways to build your confidence.
Self-discipline allows you to control yourself and your emotions. It allows you to do hard things, even when you don’t want to.
Follow-through with the things you say you are going to do and by doing so you are affirming to yourself, “I can do hard things.”
You do things that you say you will do and this leads to trust in yourself.
When you aren’t disciplined or don’t follow-through, this leads to disappointment in yourself and your abilities.
Even if you don’t feel guilty or disappointed after not doing something that you know you should do, you subconsciously tell your brain you can’t do hard things.
Overall, self-discipline is one of the best characteristics to develop.
If you’re interested in learning more about discipline and how to instill it within yourself, check out my self-discipline guide.
Learn to laugh at yourself
Don’t take yourself so seriously.
It’s OK to want to carry yourself as a professional and to avoid mistakes, but they’re inevitable.
If you make a mistake or something embarrassing happens, laugh it off.
Many people fear what others think of them, but as long as you act in a way that lives up to your standard and don’t disrespect others, who cares what they think??
If others believe or think something of you that’s not true, let them.
When you have confidence you can’t be defeated. People and judgement can’t hurt you like that.
Take care of yourself
Taking care of your body and appearance goes a long way.
Workout, eat healthy, take care of your skin and nails, manage your stress.
Not only will this increase your confidence in your appearance, but you’ll feel better internally as well.
Respect yourself, your body, and all it does for you.
When you do things that you know are good for your mind and body you just carry yourself differently.
Find something you enjoy and work on it
Working on a passion project is so rewarding.
I love that I have my blog, YouTube channels, courses, and coaching to come home to after my full-time job.
My job is enjoyable, but it’s not mine. I work under someone else and basically do what I have to do.
But having something to call my own gives me more purpose.
Whatever it is you really enjoy, make time to work on it. It doesn’t have to be a side hustle, maybe you love painting or gardening.
A lot of people end up searching for happiness in other people or in external factors, but if you have something of your own to dedicate your time and efforts to, you remove that tendency.
Don’t do things you’re not proud of/may regret
This is a big one.
Make decisions you are proud of!
When you raise your standards you typically choose not to do things that you may regret later.
You think before you say things.
You make choices wisely.
You make decisions that support your goals and who you want to be.
Personally, I take pride in the all the things I do. I love my routines, I love that I take action on my goals, I love that I push myself to do things I know I should do even if I don’t want to.
If I were to instead be lazy, I would beat myself up about it and lower my confidence in myself.
In relation, I choose not to drink or use any substance that alters my state of mind. I don’t do those things for multiple reasons (personal, health, etc.), but I also always want to be aware of what I am doing.
Intoxication can inhibit your mind to think clearly which can possibly lead to actions you are not proud of.
No judgement if you choose to, but that is how I have always viewed it.
Never stop improving
Never stop improving is my life motto.
I LOVE personal development and it’s a never ending journey.
There are so many books, videos, audio recordings, articles, and much more to listen to or read in order to improve yourself.
I’ve realized along my journey that I can keep getting better and better. I also have realized that the important areas of personal development, such as mindset and self-talk, require constant work.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness does not necessarily require meditation, though I do highly recommend it.
Mindfulness does require time to yourself though. To think and observe those thoughts.
People are afraid to spend time alone, but that is when you can learn the most about yourself.
If you properly observe your thoughts and question why you’re thinking them or what you are making them mean, you learn how to control them.
With control you will begin to turn negative thoughts into positive ones.
Take time to meditate or be alone with yourself, don’t avoid it.
Learn to love yourself and stay true to yourself
Self-love is so important.
Confidence and self-love go hand-in-hand. With them, you can’t be defeated.
When you do all these things that build confidence, you begin to love yourself from the outside in.
With self-love comes self-respect and you make decisions you are proud of. You only put yourself into situations that serve you.
You don’t have space for negativity or things that get in your way.
You stay true to yourself by saying/doing what you believe is right even if others may judge or criticize you.
You gain so much strength and ability to push through tough times.
Working toward confidence is worth it.
It’s a big factor of personal development and only leads to more success in all areas of life.